Thursday, December 18, 2008

my martha stewart days...


Its been a while. Just wanted to blog a little about my days so far. I have been on leave this week and wonder where did all the days go? It's Thursday night and I don't remember what I did this week. I remember waking up at 1030 going yawn... is it time to wake up?!.. Sigh. I am not a morning person...

So, a recurring theme for most of this week includes......

1) Little Nyonya
Yes, this is the cheezy channel 8 serial. It is so bad its soo good. Haha. All activity stops by 9pm where I sit glued to the google box and when its 10, hope its 9pm the next day. :)
2) Cooking!
Yes, a part of me wants to cook for healthy nutrition and also because I am soooo tired of MSG food. Tonight was a joint effort between my dad and I, he did the disgusting thing but I did the fun stuff. I learn today that to fry a fish nicely.... it requires a lot of oil! :)

my dad removing the inerds. Was tooo disgusting so he did it. haha.

The Stuffed Fish (Kuning with Sambal and Onions)

My dinner date. Haha. I dont have a photo of all the fishes when they were cooked because I did not add enough oil while frying... So they are not the preetiest. Oops. Check out the wholesome soup as well.... :)

Besides these domesticated tasks, I have recently felt haggard and weary. This feeling have been lingering for a while now and has resulted in me going on a little runaway to Ayutthaya. But thats a story for another time. The point I was trying to drive at was... I went for a pedicure today. Haha. Quite fun! Luxuries once in a while. So, since I don't do this all the time. I always wonder what is a good colour. In keeping with the festive season... I have decided on the following.. :)
Haha. taking pictures of feet to make it look nice is a very difficult task.. Haha. I think that feet is really a humble part of the body. Its quite amazing that of all parts of the body, He decides to wash the feet. one of the dirtiest part. I can understand Peter not wanting Jesus to wash his feet. Anyway...

So, anyway. nothing too deep for this post. I love my break for now. Until next time! :)

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

fear and dreams

Had a dreadful dream. :( My God is mighty to save.

I pray all will go well and this is an unfounded fear. :(

Journey mercies to all...

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Rites of passages

first day of school, first failure, first success, first friendship, first relationship....

don't worry... it is just one of those things. this too shall pass... our God stays constant and people still love you...


Friday, November 14, 2008

I do not pray for success, I ask for faithfulness. Mother Teresa

It's hard to be faithful when you know things don't last forever...
It's hard to be faithful when you don't like what you must do...
It's hard to be faithful when there are new people you are learning to work with...

Been a emo week for several reasons. One distant colleague decided to stop living one day while on a business trip so my colleagues in Bangkok were busy with him. What would drive someone to such a decision? Everyone has a different theory after one leaves, there are different facets of a person that is seen depending on how you know the person. I am remembered of the movie Citizen Kane. haha, it is super retro, but basically talks about how nobody really knows you cos they all see a different facet of you. well, this is one theme of the story at least. Work, personal etc. but I guess at the end of the day, only God knows everything about you, creating you and knowing the number of hairs you have.

I am also struggling for time and stars to align. The "there is a season for everything" is made extremly real,. I am figidity. restless. I don't feel right reestablishing roots here but yet at the same time, the page is not really turning yet. This results in the loneliness that is felt. yes, I m scared of imposing on people... quite silly I know but that's the fact. The church I go to now has the central theme of helping people "master the transitions in their life." I must say I am crap at it. I freak out when things must change and become nostalgic for what will be missed. But yet at the same time, I look towards the future and wonder about a life that might become. This in betweens are tiring. being in 2 realities but not really in any. Not good. Need to make tangible efforts to truly live in my reality.

This week's devotions was on psalm 23. 2 things stood out

1) " though i walk through the shadow of the valley of death, I will fear no evil".. the valley we walk through does not even need to be the valley of death, just a shadow, a faint hint of death and David recognizes that its fine. it's fine to remind myself not to be frightened. It's fine if my "drama" is not earth shattering, it's fine that I am frightened because of the shadow of another's pain. I can remember that I will NOT be frightened... and not feel bad remembering that.

2) "Surely goodness and love will dwell with me forever" This is a promise one needs to claim. It almost feels disconnected from all the psalm where David was seeking God for solace. the last section reminds us of the need to be positive. to remember that at the end of the day, God is sovereign, and I, as his Child will dwell with God. Sure this does not mean yoo hoo!! no more bad times, but this does mean redeeming, saving and gracious love from our Lord.

Onward Christian Soldier.. marching as to war...

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Part of dream realized

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

Monday, November 03, 2008

i miss the frog :(

Austria hiking... Think sound of music views. Breathtaking and tiring at the same time. Fly me away!

Sunday, November 02, 2008

My 200th post

Yay! haha. a round number. i m quite proud of myself already. I wonder how do people do 800?!? (yes, little girl, m talking bout u)

I am back home and this weekend have not been the best. :( I spent most of it crying,... Glad the weekend is over. my eyes are tired and the heart is still weary.

I am thinking about "Love the Lord your God with all your heart,mind, soul strength"... and how when veering to the "dark, lonely, scary side, I need to choose to Love God and not give up self to despair, self doubt and hopelessness. Sigh. I have very scary tendencies.

I was also thinking about the concept of friends and having people you love support you. Thank you for msn/skype people who talk to me to take away tensions, for special people who are willing to be my dustbin, for family members who give me space to be me and for others who are just in my life wishing me well stead of harm...:)

Yes, God is made perfect in my weakness... and He is mighty to save....

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

M on a row...

Hahaha. yes. i caved in and have facebook! DOTS! anyway. my favorite find so far...Haha. :)

Looking serious. I like this photo.

Let's play. This is like me telling my Dad i will study for my next stuff toy from the next university!

Monday, October 27, 2008

my immediate therapy..(happy girl)

Came into the room and guess wad i saw on my bed..

















haha, i was super excited. I have no camera. So this is a foto from the lousy webcam picture. I am a happy girl. hehehe. Thank you my sweet. Much much appreciatied. The flowers came with a handwritten card with a message from my frog but handwriting of someone who writes alphabets like Thai. hee. funny. i feel like i have a secret admirer!

Finding the good in people

I always tell others that I must find the good in people to be able to work with them. I am one of those super Asian that needs to have a relationship with you to make things happen.

Yes. a little dots... So. because of that. I cannot deal with people who stick to the books very well. I dont like people who are not nice and find it hard to deal with them.:(

So angry to have to draw a line with people. I am the sort of person that likes to love wholeheartedly. even for my to feel like i have to put a boundary between us both. I feel like I have failed and have to write you off. :(

Dear Lord, What to do???

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Transient Realities

Hello from Bangkok! :) Haha, yes, i think it is also quite hard to keep up with me. My friend has just left after spending the weekend from me. That was nice. We went shopping together and photos are with her. But I will try to ask for it online...

I hope everybody is fine and I wonder if people still read this blog. Hmmm. Anyway, the changin of blogskin cos i was a little bored of my old one. I blamed the skin for my inability to blog.. haha.

So since last update of life. Heaps have happened. Went to the UK, to frog land, frog came and visit. After that, I was whisked to Bangkok where I am currently in. haha. Sometimes, I can't even keep up with my own life. I think in a few months/years time, I will see the impact these travel has on me.. I think that this travelling however makes one more aware that time is ticking and that u can never take back the part of life that has gone by.

UK. UK was quite nice. I went to the country side for a conference attended by about 50 plus nationalities and i really did enjoy myself. I first went feeling little weary and tired but during the course of the week,the fresh air, the classes and the time shared was really useful. I felt more alive again and it was good to meet people passionate in the cause based in different countries. Bosnia, Georgia, Ethopia, Gabon, Bangladesh,Lebanon. I really do enjoy meeting people of different nationalities. same same but different. I also had a coach that talked to me about life experiences and helped me process the different work - related thoughts that were in my mind in a safe way

(Taken on my walk from the first day, was told the difference between Barley and Wheat. The lady that told us was ultra serious!.. dont ask me the difference. I forgot... )
(My best friend in the summer school.Well, one of them. She is from Myanmar and if I think my work is tough, she is having it a lot harder!!! I thank God for meeting people who are capable and compassionate in their own right!.. May God be the God of our circumstances) (I like this photo. It is taken in Cambridge. I love skies. I remember that God is good. The word is there as I had initially wanted to use this on my blog. But since I ended up not doing so.. Will post it in this post.)

After the summer school, my dearest came to visit me for my tour of London. Haha. I must say I am not a great fan of London. I think it was just the places we visited. The regular touristy sites... Too many people and I was totally sick of English food by that time. haha. i get German, Korean, French, Japanese, Chinese, Thai food... but not English. Its weird. a wrap with a pate and some cold salad and some old stuff. I dun get it. I like their Sunday roast but not normal daily food. It's weird, not yumy and very very expensive... Hmmm, maybe i just did not pay enough to eat decent. But the regular food was not the nicest treat..haha. I guess one of my favorite moments was seeing this...

I love Rainbows. It's another symbol that reminds me that God is real and he has time for frivolous surprises. Not something completely useful for pretty nevertheless. :)

Another highlight was catching up with Major Andrew. It was great. He is ever the positive pragmatist. A picture as evidence! He wanted to prove that he has grown and that Englishmen were really quite tall! He is great, I told him frog was coming and within 5 secs of seeing frog, he was like he's German! hahaha :) so funny.
After London, we went over to Bath. Bath was modeled after the Roman style and I figured that I liked it perhaps becos it was what Tuscany would look like in my mind. hehe. I dont know. But it was very pretty. The only down side to that was I was DRIVING! haha. i never thought my driving skills were particularly horrible. But put a girl in a manual girl (last time in manual girl probably during her driving test) with roundabouts out of nowhere and slopes that causes her to start and stop. It is very stressful for both her passenger and her. Haha. To give my passenger credit, he tried very hard to be supportive before becoming annoyed at her inadeptness.

Anyway. we got back alive to tell the tale. So cant be too bad. One classic driving moments was probably on our last night before flying back to Germany, we were looking for a place, originaly thinking it was "tye green", we went to a petrol kiosk and took a small photo of it from the map...(we felt very smart when we came up with this idea fyi.. hehe) When it was completly dark, we were still looking for this B&B in "tye green" but could not find it.. Boo. At 10pm, when we were all ready to give up, darling looked at his paper again and realised it was "Green tye" DOH! haha, we went to take another foto of the map and found our way there. I was super scared whenever he went out and I realised that i will make a useless country girl. Whenever there were no lights. I would freak out totally and not allow him away from sight. He thought I was mad. hehehe. Anyway, there is probably our most drama events.. Ok, fotos of Bath and stone henge! :) Pardon the summer messy hair and the goofy smile. This is outside a place that Jane Austen once rented. Darling went with me for a little tour of what her house would look like. After understanding her life a little more, her novels become a little more precious and insightful!:) All lovely...

Crazy wind. haha. Stone henge. It was nice but crazy weather... :)

So this is UK by and Large. After this, I flew to Germany for few more days to be with Darling and also to look at what "options" there might be there for me. I decided that I will be super lousy kitchen help so need something o do that can fit! Still praying for God to open the right doors...

More thoughts but thought I would start with photos again to get the blog again.

Good night, God bless and see u in Singapore soon! :)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

In contemplation of time...

It is the time you have wasted for your rose
that makes your rose so important.
- Antoine de St. Exupery, The Little Prince

Look well to this day. Yesterday is but a dream and tomorrow
is only a vision. But today well lived makes every yesterday a
dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a vision of hope.
Look well therefore to this day.
- Francis Gray

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.
- Hector Louis Berlioz

These roses under my window make no reference to former roses or
to better ones; they are for what they are; they exist with God today.
There is no time for them. There is simply the rose; it is perfect in
every moment of its existence. But man postpones or remembers;
he does not live in the present, but with reverted eye laments the past,
or heedless of the riches that surround him, stands
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

In eternity there is indeed something true and sublime.
But all these times and places and occasions are now
and here. God himself culminates in the present
moment, and will never be more divine in the
lapse of all the ages.
- Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Sunday, September 14, 2008

It is finished... :)

In all things give thanks...

I will miss the crazy hours, the portable homework in different hotel rooms, the stress, strain and pain.
Thank you Lord for sustaining me... by His Grace :)

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

who are you...

A few weeks ago,in contemplation of what's going on with life, I was asked the question who am I in the midst of all the flurry, space and time. I have been travelling, been swamped, been emotionally tested,... however, this is not who I am... This led me to consider what a Peirong is. Haha, no this is not a philosophical question. I decided that admist all my activities and stress, I am a Child of God... I was then challenged to consider what it meant to me to be a child of God...

In a bid of some positive reinforcement, I shall consider what it means to be a child of God

1) Child - Dependent on the adult, the father. Is unable to live apart from the father... No such as I have grown up... Not grown up away from God...

2) God - Big, all powerful, all knowing.

3) Love - the love between the child and God compels obedience. to make the adult, father happy.. to listen to wat he says

4) relationship - instead of slavery... not the worst thing on earth to be a child of God. Priviledged, esteemed...

... Going through emotional upheaval currently. SO many diferent variables in my little life. Dear Lord, please take from me my life,when i don't have the strength to give it away to you...

Considering my next steps. Question for people who actually read this blog... What kind of job do you think I will be happy doing? List as per below based on my MBTI type...

Church Worker
Educational Consultant
Employee Development Specialist
Fashion Designer
Graphic/Web Designer
Holistic Health Practitioner
Human Resources
Legal Mediator
Massage Therapist
Physical Therapist
Social Scientist
Social Worker
Speech Pathologist
Video Editor

Friday, July 11, 2008


Random fotos... I still sometimes wish that time is reversible.. Anyway, a little snippet of life outside home...

Community where we worked...

Capital of a province...A simpler life...

The reason for our work.... I took a much nicer foto but accidentlaly destroyed it. :(

Beautiful simple Laos PDR

Tokens of Devotion

LuangPrabang - Old captial of Lao

Can't thank God enough for taps - this is HARD WORK!

Peirong masquaradin as a Lao girl - holdin rice cases...

Work Colleagues


Playing BS/Bluff. I am sooo bad at it. Beah.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Thinking abt my frog...

The frog, the girl, the Lourve, the dream....

Sunday, June 22, 2008

The lighter side of things...

This toy greets me everyday I come home from work and cuddles me at night when I am alone in my foreign room. It doesnt complain despite being on the floor in the morning... My nails are newly painted and they are meant to keep me entertained. They are of the same color, and each plays a vital part in keeping me happy... :)))
ok. back to work. Pout.

All i want to do...

I am currently writing an investigation summary report. Bleah. So, as a reprieve, i google very random sites from soccer, make up, music lyrics, Pete Sampras, Stefi graf etc.. you get the point. I am currently procrastinating.

Mommy is here and she is sleeping now. We did some shopping, did our nails, i did a facial and then went for dinner. We ordered a bottle of beer together. This is definitely a first.. haha. Quite funny but it was altogether nice. Its nice to have company i guess. i do so many things alone sometimes i think it is not the healthiest....

Anyway, something has been on my mind lately... I guess it has to do with me making arrangements to send out letters etc. I think about what love is. haha.not in the flowers and chocolates way, but i think that I want to be a grandmother that has weathered it through with my husband that i love more with the passing of years and is still graceful and smiley and know that life while tough, has been beautiful. Recently, I realise that the only way i am getting to becoming a grandmother is actually through living everyday of life now... there is no other alternative.

With this application, one of the questions asks about my career aspirations. While i always tell people i love, that i want to make God happy, i realise that I am all about the people. Concepts, while great, do not intrigue me as much as people, human relations do. I remember watching sesame street when I was 3 and being hooked on it not because of the learning o the A-B-Cs etc, it was rather the little snippets of drama that takes place with the people livin on sesame street. hah,yes, i am strange that way...

I am born of the instant society. Want things now. With work, I slowly understand things take time. There is a process involved. God, please be with the things that are so very dear to my life. I pray you will open my eyes to walk the path of goodness, even if it is at times through the valley of the shadow of death....

I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad

Carry you around when your arthritis is bad

All i wanna do is grow old with you

Friday, June 13, 2008

Audacity of Hope

I like Obama because of many reasons, but mainly because he gives me something to believe in. Yes, I know, he is probably not the most straight and honest person out there but he is the more honest person in this race... I shall not even begin to slam the character of McCain.. Dont like him.

Hope in the face of discouragement. Hope in the face of realities, issues and practicalities. :(Hope that is not the same as wishful thinking. Hope that in time to come.... My God will be mighty to save. :(

On an another exciting note... someone tried to rob me yesterday! i can go home now.... had my brush with crime here though I never thought that this was possible. I was walking down the road as I do for most nights on my way to dinner when suddenly a motorbike rides really near me and tries to take my money pouch!! Thankfully, I was holding to it rather tightly, he sort of scratched my hand while trying to get it and I glared at him (yes, peirong can glare).. anyway, they drove on when they failed... Quite shocking. I guess it is good that no bodily harmed happened. I never expected this in Laos, so much so for a sleepy country. The scary thing is, the first thought in my head was... cool, I have something to blog about. haha. happy they didnt take my phone away:)

Ok, have a good weekend. I pray that God will continue to watch the work situation in this office. I think i get emotionally involved with the people I work with, not in a replace frog way, but in a I really want to help them way.

God made me... cannot reject myself for being emo... Going for a staff retreat with the staff here next week. Should be fun. have a great weekend.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Love never seeks its own.....

don't understand this sometimes... :S According to Mat, I tolerate, don't say anything and then suddenly... explode. Haha. I would question the accuracy of this but I am wondering where is the fine balance between telling one what you want and not seeking your own...

I am happy I have my whole life to figure out what Love means. Maybe with the same animal, maybe not. But it is good to know that it is fine at the end of the day if I mess up today, it is not the end of the world.

Emo weekend. I think it is cos of the ridiculous stress during the week. I never knew that watching bbc and cnn can reduce me to tears. haha, i think i reached a new threshold. :) My brother said.. well, I guess crying can sometimes be fun. haha. er, no. i m just emo. sorry. beah...

Need to get ready to go to small group church/discussion. Bleah. I dunno how to get there n tuk tuk driver will cheat me. :( charge me 4 dollars. NOT fair. bleah. sigh. :(Need to learn this bike thing. Scared after one rather traumatising experience.

This suden contrast of heaps of social activity at home and the staying in hotel room by myself now makes the latter a lot harder to adjust too. Happy thing is the hotel people all know my name now.. "P-rong, the driver waiting you downstairs", "P-rong, where u going?" etc... I guess it is nice to be a familiar thing to people..

Dear Lord, please don't give up on me..Oh, I bought the movie adaptation of the francine rivers book "Sin Eater", can i watch it instead of going to church?:) Hmmm. sigh. I really don't want to make small talk. Shy, ..... Ok, got to shower anyway.

Catch u soon. Muack.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Emo David

How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and everyday have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Look on me and answer, O lord my God
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death
And my enemy will say, :I have overcome him,
And my foes will rejoice when I all

But I trust in your unfailing love,
My heart rejoices in your salvation
I will sing to the Lord,
For he has been good to me

Psalm 13

David is very human as I am. Understand how the pain that he feels seems like eternity to him and yet he knows that there is a “but”, a hope in God’s love and if all fails, a memory of God’s goodness to him.

Restless. I wanted to blog earlier about how there is a certain charm in being subordinate to the weather, whether rainy or dry, a clear indication that I am but a creation in the scheme of things, that I m not invincible and definitely not self-sufficient… However, this rain has killed my internet and I left my phone in the office. Feel completely disconnected. Grrr

Doing more salary stuff. I am frustrated. This does not engage me personally and there are piles of paper on my bed. I increasingly feel an end to what I know coming up. However, the future is so uncertain it stirs my gut. Sermon says that faith is spelled as “O-B-E-Y”. Need to know what to obey. So, I am currently contemplating a move to be closer to my frog. I don’t know the specifics yet but I know there is a desire to be nearer him. God knows why I am even considering this. I don’t know the shape or form this is going to take. Thinking of it brings about a mix of excitement and doubt. Sigh. I need to know that God is sovereign and he will direct my steps. Pout.

So, I think it will be good to understand what makes me tick, to do something that I am passionate about. What am I passionate about? Hmmm. I remember a time when passion is all I know and care about… As one grows up, there is the need to balance the passion with the “common sense” and all that growing up brings. There is a certain sense of recklessness and self abandonment in passion, I know that this brought me to work in WV. An experience that has woken me up to more of my senses and tested me to see what kind of person I am. People ard me comment that I look tired and wonder if I will resign soon. Thinking this is not the best for me. Sure the lifestyle is mad. (4 very different lifestyles in 1 month) but I don’t believe that this is in vain…. yes, I need to remember that life is a journey and not a mere sprint. Somewhere in the past, I felt a deep seated need to get things out of the system for whatever reason, now, I need to remember that I can’t kill myself doing all these things but need to “pace” myself. So interesting how perspectives can change one’s actions.

Ok, this writing thing is good at calming me down. Back to comparing benchmark positions… The motivation in doing my work is in seeing that there might be a potential tangible effect to people who work in the office.

Dear Lord, at the end of the day, you are in control and we are but instruments of your peace, teach me to sing the song you would wish…..

Nite world. With love and kind thoughts.

Friday, May 16, 2008

kiddo says i look like a china food promoter...

This is me eating Cheese Fondue. I look happy here. I have a tendency to be mellow and melancholic. I like the big smile in this foto. Don't quite recognise me here.. Anyway, detour was sweet. Enjoyed it. Glad to be almost done with Bangkok...On my way back to Singapore for a week and then back to Laos! See you folks soon!

................. Yurong says i look like a food promoter.. in the spirit of that...

Waffles in the middle of the day... and....

TULIPS! hee, frog says only pensioners go here!

Ok, final photo of my frog. This was taken while climbing up a mountain.. He looks gay here! hehe. ok. sleepy sleepy time. Nite for now world. God bless and keep you.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Never a dull moment

Wrote this while in Bangkok... Am now in Dubai.. Hehe, strange place. I still think Singapore has a nicer airport! :) People here queue for everything!!! Muack. talk to u soon...


I am transiting in Bangkok for the next few hours. I now know how the Bangkok airport works, eg. 1) They have the same transit set up at 2 ends of the airport. 2) Their cosmetics duty free is more expensive than Singapore and most of the international brands are found at the center of the terminal…I personally don’t like this airport, but learnt its conveniences and I believe I have checked out most if not all the eating places… Whenever I go to the money exchange, I almost feel like they have given me pocket money to eat.

So, I am enroute on my whirlwind visit to the land of the castles. I missed my frog, wanted to bum with him, hold his hand (or webbed feet for that matter) and decided that I will find a ticket to see him on a detour to my conference in Bangkok. This is however a very far detour, am currently on a 3 hour transit to Dubai which is 6 plus hours away, following that, will be in Dubai for 3 hours (quite exciting to see their airport! Haha), then off to Frankfurt after what I believe is a 7 hour flight to see frog and his tadpole. I told my father about it and today he messaged, “Peirong, are we going to see our frog today?” hehe, I love my father, he is so cool! He thinks his daughter is a bit mad but yet loves her through her mad endeavors… (his messages to her used to be Hallelujah etc, today, it was, will pray for His angels to protect you… haha… )

So, I am done with Laos for the next round. This time was rather intense. I visited 4 provinces in about 1 month, each time with a presentation as well as a forum, a platform for staff to speak. I still feel like I am a kid masquerading as an adult. When the staff talk to me about serious stuff like their salary and how their purchasing power has dropped, or when I have dinner with big government officials, I am like erm, sure, why not…

One of my highlights in my trip is the Lao New Year. I was in Luang Prabang, the most touristy place in Laos during this period of time. When I first arrived, I was positively stressed out because it has been a long week and I had numerous deadlines that I was trying to beat… Anyway, I extended my visit there to experience the Lao New Year and it was a rather strange surreal experience. The whole place kind of turned into a big Disneyland. Lao New Year is like Songkran, which doesn’t really mean anything until it happens to you. I have a half suspicion that Beer Lao invented this holiday as it really felt like merry people splashing water at each other just to check out the reaction of the other party. We sat in a tuk tuk together, think 9 people on a small tuk tuk pulled by a 250 cc bike… = super slow tuk tuk… As we travel down the road, we get splashed by water from our left, right, back, front… Sometimes unsuspectingly. Our first tuk tuk died cos water went into the engine and we had to change tuk tuk. Quite funny. J We watched the procession that led to the Wat and went there as well. Beautiful Wat, took many pictures and saw what was happening. I never cease to be amazed at how Buddhism is such a way of life that not being Buddhist is almost not being Lao, especially so in Luang Prabang. The economy, social events, even beauty pageant ( Miss Lao had the honor of being the first to water the Buddha…) are tied into their religion. As an individual working in a Christian NGO with a mission statement that reads “our mission is to follow our Lord Jesus Christ in walking with the poor…” how do I share our organization’s faith and be relevant and true? Anyway, questions that will not be sorted out in one day. So that was fun, night market shopping, Wat checking etc.

The down side to this trip must be getting really sick. Whenever I am pmsy, the immunity drops to a minimum and not sleeping enough or not having enough to drink is enough to make me really really sick. I was down and out for the whole weekend and couldn’t do anything besides lie in bed, watch some tv and talk a little. Not too fun…

It is now 111am and I am still waiting. I was sitting down with my hotdog in the food area when the guy beside me decides to serenade me… guess the song…. “sex bomb sex bomb, you’re my sex bomb….”!!! I tried really hard not to react just so he thinks that I don’t understand. He repeats himself again and again and started making funny sounds.. This is when I messaged my sister trying to look all serious. Hah. Strange Man. Bleah. Anyway, I decided to walk away and he found another target to talk to. He was telling her the languages he speaks, trying to impress her and make her laugh, or so I thought. Within minutes, I realize he has stopped talking to her and as I continued to observed, she was a Chinese national and did not understand him well. Muahaha.

Ok, I will sign off now. I am off to the land of castles and will drive to Austria and Switzerland. We stay near a lake (lake Constance) and I don’t know where else. Following that, I go back to Bangkok and continue with the organization of 2 relatively important Regional forums.. Never a dull moment indeed.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Somewhere out there....

One of the most difficult things in being a nomad is when nobody knows your schedule anymore...When you feel like you r imposing on another's schedule as well cos there is a lack of communication... Well. for the most part. I always vacilate between being angry and trying to be sensible. End up just being frustrated. Grr. Like yesterday, I was so mad i cried to sleep. Well, one way tht I find dealing with anger constuctively is to vocalise my anger (between my God and I), to say it as it is and not make excuses for others. I dunno, perhaps my expectations are also rocket high as well... Beah. Need to stop this lest I become clingy girl... :S

I was also severly in pain this week because of cramps. Haha. Hate it.. eeeee. and i forgot to bring erm, pads? and I was trying to tell my colleague about it since we were going everywhere to gether... it took her a while to register what I was going on about and went she finally understood my beating around the bush.. she went.. ahhh .. soooofffffyyyy.haha,. i am erm yea *blush*... i thought it was particularly funny when we went to some really random shop and she asked if they had it matter of factly. Hmm, i think it was too open for me. strange... told her that my sister will never be caught buying this.. haha. interesting.. point noted. pls remember to bring when you do province visits.

Province visits also makes the capital look a lot better. Couldnt sleep for most of the nights. Difficult. I think i have the good fortune disease (H0 Mia).. haha, think when having women inconveniences, it gets more eeee. haha. But small mater compared to big returns i suppose.

Today we rushed back from the province also because a colleague needed to rush home (via aeroplane) as fast as possible as his dad was seriously ill, was in ICU when the decision was made and dad has since passed away. (Passed away is a very strange way of putting it. I don’t understand the term… ) A very real cos of working outside of your country as well.hmmm....

On a brighter note, this week's presentations went really well. Haha, I am amazed at how it was received, always want to laugh cos they take what i have to say seriously.. hee. quite funny really. But what I do go on about is not laughing matter I suppose and I will just try to do my best. I think that one important organizational thinking is to be open abt the values of the organization. Well. at least for organziaions such as mine.. I feel like the singaporean govt a little this week with al the World Vision "proaganda" that I spewed. haha, i think, consoled myself in that I actually believed in this values and so, dont feel too much of a hypocrite...

So, this ends my week here. Really glad to be back in Vientiane. Clean sheets and a room that I don't mind.. :) Wireless internet is great too. I am very thankful! Hah, i need to eat something now. super hungry. my motivation at the end of the day. despite all these inconvenience. is that I know that i am a instrument that has use at a time such as this. I will allow the big one to use me and continue to try to think of the good, noble, pure things... not allowing myself to dwell in self pity.So help me God.

Talk to me/u soon. hugs.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

I am bored on a sunday night.

They say a picture speaks a thousand words. I think they have been many more words than pictures in this blog. I wanted to watch CSI.. but no more AXN in the room :(So sad, So i thought i would do something constructive and photo-journal my life since I moved on and "flew solo".. haha, this is all part of my therapy, to remind myself that my life did not end and that I indeed did many things, good bad and ugly. The friend in question is getting married and yes, i am flying back all this miles for it... haha, i think one day when i am calm, i know that i would have wanted to be there. So I m going. Hey, he was not just this bf.. he was the special friend, the semblance of an anchor for the past 8 yrs of my life. haha. And yes, I will need to let this anchor go and continue to walk this journey.. Life has been a treat i must confess, (my sister might beg to differ and say i cry all the time) but hey, if that's wat it takes.. will do it... :)Today, i went to the small group in Laos and remembered that God does not try us with more than we can bear. I thank God for knowing us through and through and for being the Lord of it all :) *cheers groom and bride,have fun preparing and I will think what I shd wear! haha, see u folks soon*... enjoy the photos.

(the trip to Krabi... The t-shirt says it all...)

(Work colleagues in PNG)

(First wedding of people I actually love and care about ;)... haha.)

(China with the family.. they r my life, people i learn to appreciate more and more)

(Cheating Death - Sunrise in a settlement in Port Moresby....Bad Idea..)

(Colleagues in PNG.. my own farewell)

(Market in PNG.. somewhere)

(My new room...:) )

(meet the frog *wink*)

(People I work with at home...)

(Seafood Christmas dinner with the favorite girls)

(THE castle in the land of the castles.. Magical.)

(My favourite statue in the Lourve)

.... and with this I end. :) May you all have a beautiful week coming up!.. Sabaidee! (Greetings in lao)